The Rotherham Bugle

There was further evidence that central government cuts continue to bite this week, with the announcement by RBC Leisure and Amenities Department that all council controlled swimming facilities in the borough are to be operated on a  water-free basis from next month. According to council spokesman Irene Drysdale, the council can no longer afford to fill and heat the towns swimming facilities. In a pre-prepared statement, Ms Drysdale said,

“After a careful review of budgets,  the council have reached the difficult decision to empty  the borough recreational swimming  facilities.   We will continue to operate on a hydrate-free business platform, and so customers will still be able to use all our swimming facilities, albeit in a dry environment. Not only will this save money on water and heating, but it will negate the requirement for lifeguards. Safety is of paramount importance to us, and this move will be a major step forward in ensuring that all facility users are able to reap the health benefits of swimming in a non hazardous setting.  We feel confident that many customers will welcome the opportunity  to use our facilities without changing, getting  wet or having some old perv staring at their thrupnies.”

Not everyone is convinced. Dave Turner uses the Maltby pool three times a week, and is left confused by the plan. “I can see how I can still do crawl, but what about backstroke? And I’m going to have to be extra careful diving in. The top board will definitely have to go or somebody is going to get hurt.” he said. “Mark my words.”

Ms Drysdale from the council,  accepts there will be criticism, but remains positive “These plans are going to  save money, prevent drownings and are more inclusive in that they enable non-swimmers to use our facilities in safety” she said  “I accept that some customers may miss the water, but you can’t please everyone.”