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The Rotherham Bugle

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2024-11-14

Facebook To Clamp Down On All Lies


 

Following our story earlier this week about Facebook aiming to banish fake and misleading news items from the social media site, The Rotherham Bugle has learned that the company intend to extend the policy, and  rid the site of all misleading posts and status updates.

Although a full list of affected contributions is still to be finalised, The Bugle understand that the following have been specifically targeted for action:

 

Posts exclaiming “Best night eva!!!” or similar that don’t include a further update later in the evening making clear that it ended slumped on the stairs wearing one broken shoe while sobbing into an old cardigan.

Heavily edited and filtered photos that make mingers look hot.

Carefully cropped holiday photo’s which cut out gas works, overflowing bins and tattooed chavs throwing up in skips.

Stylised and filtered  photos of  restaurant food that actually tasted a bit crap.

Humorous and zany photos of people who are neither humorous nor zany, but are, in reality, attention seeking arse holes.

A leaked report from the company predict that removal of all posts similar to the above will reduce the current daily Facebook post count of 4.75 billion down to a more manageable 126.

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