How Much Is Your House Worth? University Boffin Develops Algorithm That Can Tell You In Seconds
2017-12-05
Do you know how much your house is worth? Well a maths professor has come up with a property valuation algorithm which he claims can tell you faster, and more accurately, than traditional valuation methods – and now is the perfect time to use it.
Professor Max Offens from the University of south Maltby says he’s identified a clear inverse relationship between the value of a house and the amount of lights, tinsel and tacky inflatable Christmas type shit that can be seen by the casual passer-by. “Broadly speaking, the more Christmas shit you put up, the lower the value of your house” he told us. “It’s pretty much a straight line graph when we map it. I’ve never seen a correlation like it.”
By way of example, Professor Offens contrasts historic multi-million pound Wentworth Woodhouse, where you won’t find so much as a sodding fairy light, with certain streets in Rawmarsh, where houses which can be seen from the international space station, can be purchased with bottle tops and empties.
The professor hopes to market his algorithm to estate agents throughout the UK as a cheaper alternative to sending out a trained valuer, but he admits there are drawbacks., “At the upper end, valuations are going to be problematic until December” he said “although obviously in areas like Canklow, you can start in the third week of August.”
Professor Offens refused to be drawn on the reasons for the correlation, “That’s outside my area of expertise,” he told us “and anyway, I live in Matlby and have got my family to consider.”
