Celebrity From 1980’s Looks 30 Years Older Than He Did
2017-12-30
A celebrity from the 1980’s who we can’t named for legal reasons, looks 30 years older than when he was famous it can be revealed. Visitors to numerous websites over the past few months will have been met by the headline “You won’t believe what **** ******* looks like now! ”
Anyone clicking through is confronted with the shocking proof that the celebrity has aged in a way congruent with the passage of time. Incredibly, he isn’t a frozen-in-time representation of his publicity photos from 1986. The Bugle understand that other celebrities have gone through a similar ageing process, and the disturbing evidence of this is also revealed for all to see on the Internet.
“I can’t believe it” said former fan Tracy Munter, 48, when we caught up with her at a Weightwatchers remedial class in Greasbrough. “I used to fancy him like mad but not any more. I feel like I’ve been conned. Apart from tripling my weight, I look exactly the same as I did in 1986. I can’t believe he’s let himself go like this.”
Research by the Bugle has revealed clear evidence of other celebrities from the 1980’s who are fatter, balder, greyer or wrinklier than they used to be. Some of them have got old, and there are unconfirmed rumours that others have even died.
“It’s true.” said professor Luke Young from the Institute of Ageing Studies “Being the spandex-wearing lead singer in a one hit wonder pop band from the 1980’s doesn’t turn you into Peter Pan. People need to get real.”
The Bugle is currently investigating rumours that a prominent celebrity from the 1990’s has started wearing glasses.
