Wiggins To Make Comeback For Team Emphysema
2018-03-06
Tour de France winner and multi Olympic gold medalist, Sir Bradley Wiggins, is set to make a dramatic comeback to competitive cycling. The Bugle undertstands that the former Team Sky man has signed for the newly formed Team Emphysema from next season. Wiggins hit the headlines this week following a government report suggesting that his use of strong asthma medication prior to big races, overstepped the ethical line, and may have enhanced performance.
Given that so many of the top cyclists suffer from a condition which inhibits their ability to process oxygen, the Bugle understands that the thinking behind the formation of the new team is that a condition that inhibits that ability even more, will require stronger and more potent drugs to regulate, and this can only have a positive effect on results. A team spokesperson said “Aside from the medication, we’re going to be pressing for our riders to be hooked up to oxygen tanks during the race. This is a seriously debilitating condition, and it’s important that we’re able to operate on a level playing field.”
As we went to press, it wasn’t known whether Wiggins has been diagnosed with Emphysema, as all the relevant medical records have either been misplaced, lost on a stolen laptop, or never commited to paper or pixel in the first place.
