Pseudo-Intellectual Smackheads Forced To Seek Alternative Employment As NME Ceases Publication
2018-03-08
There was dismay amongst pseudo intellectual smackhead journalists last night, with the news that New Musical Express is to cease its print publication after 66 years. The weekly magazine has always been a safe haven for wannabe wordsmith’s, heavily dependent on drink or drugs, who could get paid to spew out 2,000 words of incomprehensible bollocks, secure in the knowledge that their readers were too pissed, stoned or stupid to notice. But now that’s all about to end.
“I blame the internet,” said one former NME writer who asked not to be named, “Time was that you had to go to the newsagents once a week to read the ramblings of substance-abusing tossers, strangling the English language to within a gnats cock of its life – micro analysing shit that matters to nobody apart from themselves. But now we’ve got social media for that.”
We tried to get reaction from some people in the 14 to 19 age group who have historically been NME’s target market, but we couldn’t find one who knew what a magazine was.
