Plans To Improve Atmosphere At Old Trafford Do Not Include Entertaining The Crowd Admits Mourinho
2018-03-21
It is well known amongst football fans that the atmosphere at Old Trafford is similar to that of a morgue which caters for extremely dull corpses and their equally moribund surviving relatives. Even Manager Jose Mourinho has previously said that Old Trafford is too quiet. Well now the club are keen to do something about it, and have canvassed the fans for ideas.
Amongst the suggestions being considered are song sheets issued to fans at the turnstiles and continental-style ‘cheerleaders’ with megaphones to lead the singing and improve the atmosphere at home games. However, manager Mourinho was keen to stress tonight, that on no account will the team stop boring the arse off everyone.
Some fans have suggested that the lack of atmosphere is down to the fact that much of the crowd is either asleep or contemplating suicide, and that maybe trying to attack once in a while instead of herding ten bastard men behind the ball might generate some kind of enthusiasm from those gathered.
“I did not get where I am today by entertaining people,” said Mourinho as he practiced his smouldering look “I expect the crowd to generate their own atmosphere. My mere presence should be enough. I am, after all, the special one.”
