Frustration As Virtue Signallers Delete Facebook And Then Realise They Can’t Tell Anyone About It
2018-03-23
Virtue signallers, who are really pleased with themselves for deleting Facebook in protest at its misuse of personal data, have suddenly realised that they have no means of boring the arse off everyone about it.
Martin Smug-Twat from Fulwood in Sheffield is typical of those we spoke to. He deleted his account on Wednesday and was keen to tell everyone he knows. “My first thought was to make a Facebook post “he told us “but then I realised I’ve deleted my account, which is ia bit of a bummer.” It was at this point that Martin also realised that Facebook was the only means he had to contact 90% of his social network. “It’s very inconvenient.” he said “I’ve only been able to tell my girlfriend and my mum. What’s the point in making a grand gesture if you can’t play the billy big potatoes about it? I might have to reactivate my account to tell people I’ve deleted it. Wait a minute, that’s not going to work.”
As the Bugle went to press, Martin was still attempting to cobble together a collection of telephone numbers, email addresses and 1970’s PO box numbers to re-open the lines of communication. He was also considering investing in a carrier pigeon.
