The Rotherham Bugle

It’s been suspected for centuries, but in less than two decades the internet has proved it – the world is full to bursting with untipped, max strength, totally unmitigated wankers.

Under the cloak of anonymity, bellends who would have been previously thought reasonable and normal members of society, have proved that it is only the threat of real world consequences that has thus far stopped them revealing themselves to be vindictive, bullying and spineless cowards.

“The internet, and social media in particular, has given voice to people with nothing to say.” says Professor Andy Mann, senior lecturer in Applied Nobsackery at south Barnsley University. “It’s given equal billing to virtuoso violinists and twats with a paper and comb. It’s given an audience to those who should be playing to an empty house and walking off to the sound of their own footsteps. It’s made the world more depressing by laying bare what lay beneath the facade.”

Professor Mann recommends that anyone doubting his conclusions should spend half an hour perusing a Youtube comments section on a subject of their own choosing. “It will descend into vile insults, gratuitous abuse  and threats of violence,” he said “It always does. It’s not what you’d expect of Morris Dancers or Crochet enthusiasts, but it’s what you get.”

There is one  group of people immune to, and exempted from, any criticism though,  according to the Professor. “People who like and share mildly humorous articles written by shitheads with far too much time on their hands,” he said  “they’re alright.”