The Rotherham Bugle

In a bizarre twist on events taking place in the United States, notorious porn actor Ron Jeremy has categorically denied having any kind of relationship with Jeremy Corbyn. As it emerged that the star of such classic films as Throbin Hood and The Buttologist is of Russian and Jewish descent, Mr Corbyn let it be known through a spokesperson that the pair had enjoyed a brief romantic liaison in a hotel room over ten years ago.

“Jeremy and Ron were both attending a hate preachers symposium in Milton Keynes.” he said. “They hit it off straight away and one thing led to another.  Jeremy has always had a close affinity with Russians and Jews, so it was a natural fit, so to speak.”

Ron Jeremy categorically denied that the affair took place last night. “I did make a movie involving a scene with a dishevelled gnome once” he told the Bugle “But that was for money.  I had no idea who this guy was until this morning and then did a Google search. Just being associated with someone whose had a pop at Diane Abbott could ruin my career. I’m talking to my lawyers.”

As the row raged on today, claims by Mr Corbyn that he is able to describe Mr Jeremy’s genitalia in detail,  are not expected to carry much weight.