The Rotherham Bugle

Vegans have been told that they’re not welcome at a pub frequented by lactose intolerant drinkers.

Management at the Kings Head near Yorkshire have posted a sign on the door saying that due to bad blood between the two rival groups with specialist dietary requirements, vegans are barred from the establishment.

“It’s a disgrace”, said Tristan Twatis , a commited vegan. “What are these people afraid of…well apart from dairy products I mean?

Landlord Max Cheese was unrepentant when we caught up with him “It’s for the best.” he said. “The lactose intolerant crew that drink in here are a rough bunch and it all kicked off last week when some vegans came in and there was a nasty row over Albumin. It’s better if vegans drink somewhere else.”

As the Bugle went to press, the Vegans were still looking for a place to drink after a row over the sentience or otherwise of Cod, led to an unseemly brawl at a Pescetarian bar near Barnsley.