A middle aged couple staying at a country house hotel have briefly looked up from their breakfast newspapers it can be revealed. The couple, believed to be from somewhere in sodding Berkshire, were taking their fourteenth short break of the year in an attempt to fill the void left by an empty nest, a non-existent

Westminster was said to be in shock this afternoon at the news that the Prime Ministers fleece has announced plans to go solo. Speaking through its agent, the light blue fleece – which has been virtually inseparable from Mrs May in recent months – said that it was feeling stifled by the relationship, and wished

A pro-Brexit protest by lorry drivers flopped this morning as their attempt to disrupt the motorway network with slow, incompetent and inconsiderate driving failed to result in anyone noticing a difference. “I don’t get it,” said one driver who asked not to be named for fear of being rear ended by one of Eddie Stobart’s

A plane full of idiots returning from holiday, are acting all surprised that it’s colder at home than where they’ve just  been, it has emerged. The plane load of idiots, many still wearing flip flops and shorts, were ten minutes out of Manchester on a return trip from Tenerife last night when the pilot announced