Middle-Aged Couple Briefly Look Up From Newspapers
2019-03-29
A middle aged couple staying at a country house hotel have briefly looked up from their breakfast newspapers it can be revealed.
The couple, believed to be from somewhere in sodding Berkshire, were taking their fourteenth short break of the year in an attempt to fill the void left by an empty nest, a non-existent sex life and two careers that have hit the buffers big style.
The pair, who normally read the Daily Mail, had ostentatiously ordered the Telegraph and had scattered the various sections across their breakfast table. Ignoring each other, they were pretending to be engrossed in important world affairs, when completely out of the blue, they both looked up at once.
What had grabbed their attention was a young couple, in their twenties, coming into the room while talking animatedly to each other. It quickly became apparent that this wasn’t an argument played out for the hundredth time, or a row about wet towels, but they actually had something to say to each other.
An onlooker told the Bugle “It was as if the were looking into the past. They sighed simultaneously and then went back to searching for articles about immigrants, benefits scroungers and the latest miracle cure for Alzheimer’s.”
As The Bugle went to press, the couple were said to be touring a stately home which was exactly the same as the one they went to last month.
