Anti-Democracy Protestors Descend On Downing Street
2019-12-14
In scenes that even we can’t make up, a bunch of complete tools who don’t appear to know how democracy works are today marching in protest at a government which was duely elected by a substantial majority of the population on Thursday.
In a statement heavily coated in both irony and deja vu, a spokesperson for the knobs said, “This Tory government are hateful and nasty bastards, and people are too stupid to know what they were voting for. They were duped by the biased right wing Tory press and media.”
A spokesperson for ordinary people everywhere said “Stop whinging you condescending, bile-fueled arrogant tossers. You lost the argument despite having virtually the whole of social media to yourselves and dozens of high profile individuals from music film and tv, who have infinitely more reach than the declining printed press, pumping out your pro-Labour agenda 24/7 . Oh and two national newspapers as well. If you tried communicating with humans outside of your own tight digitally bound demographic once in a while, this result wouldn’t have come as any surprise. Just because you shout loudest, doesn’t mean you’ll win or you’re right.”
A spokesperson for the Bugle said “No, I know this isn’t satire, but Jesus H Christ!”
