Barnsley Man’s New Year Fitness Dreams In Tatters As He Forgets His Kit
2020-01-05
A Barnsley man’s new year weight loss and fitness goals were left in tatters this morning after he forgot his kit.
Eighteen stone Geoff Lard, 36 from Wombwell had pledged to make 2020 the year he finally took control of his health and fitness, and had put everything in place to make it happen, including taking out membership of a state of the art gym. But his dreams were crushed when he arrived at the gym on 4th January for the first time, only to find that he’d forgotten his kit.
“I’m gutted but what can you do?” said a disappointed Geoff “You can’t do owt without kit. I must have left it in the house or summat. I really thought this was going to be the year but there’s no point now. I’m going to try to put it behind me and focus on having another go in 2021.”
Geoff’s wife Karen appeared sceptical when we spoke to her later “He’s a big fat idle bastard” she said “He forgot his kit last year, and the year before that. Never forgets where the chippy is though.”
As The Bugle went to press, Geoff was understood to be unconscious on his sofa, having also abandoned Dry January after an unexpected encounter with a cheap pint.
