Rumour That Coronavirus Is Spread By Supping Bottled Lager Causes Panic In Barnsley
2020-01-28
There was mass panic in Barnsley this afternoon, after rumours began to circulate that the Coronavirus is spread by drinking gassy Mexican lager out of bottles – often with a bit of lime shoved unceremoniously down the neck.
“I knew no good would come of supping that foreign muck” said local rumour-monger Reg Blower as he sipped a pint of bitter in his local club. “Young un’s come in here supping that shite and then they’re out into a Chinese takeaway. Well you only have to put two and two together…Corona beer, Chinese food. That’s where it started int it. China. That bloke that named it was going to call it Sanmiguelavirus but it’s a bit of a mouthful. That’s what I heard anyway.”
The panic over bottled beer is the second Coronavirus-linked rumour to hit the town in the past week. Just last Saturday, rumours spread that a local man had almost certainly contracted the virus after he inadvertently visited a website selling Chinese fireworks.
