Bodyguard risks bringing down aircraft protecting man who brought down country
2020-02-05
A massive security enquiry is underway this morning after it emerged that a bodyguard risked bringing down an aircraft while guarding the man who brought down the country.
David Cameron was on a BA transatlantic flight when a passenger alerted cabin crew to a loaded gun that had been left in the aircraft toilet during a routine dump. It later emerged that the gun belonged to the bodyguard of the former Prime Minister who was subsequently relieved of active duties and is being widely heralded as something of a careless twat. But a source close to the bodyguard says he feels aggrieved.
“The way he sees it, all he did was risk bringing a plane down whereas Cameron triggered Brexit and brought down the whole country. The gun thing was all sorted in five minutes but we’ll still be paying for Brexit in 50 years.”
As we went to press, Mr Cameron was believed to be sunning himself on a beach somewhere while his former bodyguard was counting paperclips in a windowless office in Watford.
